From King James:
"And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them."
Wow... I'm always amazed when I'm reminded how brutal a God we have in the Bible. We must have fucked up something terrible for an ever-loving omnipotent Eternal to regret its own creation.
Harsh.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
The New World [!]
There is a bacteria... a very special kind of bacteria.
This bacteria can be found off the coast of many nations across the world.
It has only recently evolved and has a very unique diet.
It eats Oil.
There is a group. They have a vision.
A vision, of a New World.
A World free of the dependency on oil; of a fuel that destroys the planet and holds nations hostage to its limited supply.
The current rate of consumption, it would still be years before the supply ran out. It would be too late.
They had a plan: Hyperevolve the Oil-Eating Bacteria and use it to destroy the worlds accessible crude oil supply. Force the world into developing alternative energy sources. The world built on oil would crumble into the past and a New World would arrive. The dawn of a new era.
What they needed was a way to give the bacteria access to immense quantities of oil and force the bacteria to evolve.
So they found the easiest way to get a lot of crude... They got into the oil business.
They worked their way into corporations...
And they caused an oil spill.
And they made sure, that it was a big one.
For the good of the World.
This bacteria can be found off the coast of many nations across the world.
It has only recently evolved and has a very unique diet.
It eats Oil.
There is a group. They have a vision.
A vision, of a New World.
A World free of the dependency on oil; of a fuel that destroys the planet and holds nations hostage to its limited supply.
The current rate of consumption, it would still be years before the supply ran out. It would be too late.
They had a plan: Hyperevolve the Oil-Eating Bacteria and use it to destroy the worlds accessible crude oil supply. Force the world into developing alternative energy sources. The world built on oil would crumble into the past and a New World would arrive. The dawn of a new era.
What they needed was a way to give the bacteria access to immense quantities of oil and force the bacteria to evolve.
So they found the easiest way to get a lot of crude... They got into the oil business.
They worked their way into corporations...
And they caused an oil spill.
And they made sure, that it was a big one.
For the good of the World.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
[NTS] Twist with the Tower
Make the tower have variable stages. Ones that are changed by the climber.
Make those changes permanent for the run of the climb.
When the PC completes the tower, they are crowned champion.
They are the Tower Champion until a new climber comes to take on the tower.
(New Game+: Allow PC to climb same tower only now the story changes to account for them being the Champion?)
New Game++ Style: New PC is a climber attempting to climb the tower of the current Tower Champion (former character.)
Tower setup is based on the previous PCs run.
Find a way to get users to be able to enter any players User Name to run their tower.
Make those changes permanent for the run of the climb.
When the PC completes the tower, they are crowned champion.
They are the Tower Champion until a new climber comes to take on the tower.
(New Game+: Allow PC to climb same tower only now the story changes to account for them being the Champion?)
New Game++ Style: New PC is a climber attempting to climb the tower of the current Tower Champion (former character.)
Tower setup is based on the previous PCs run.
Find a way to get users to be able to enter any players User Name to run their tower.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Note To Self
Modify OGL rules.
Incorporate early 90's square-style RPG elements.
Create basic custom RPG rules set.
Mine brain for crazy ideas.
Run the game for player(s).
Incorporate early 90's square-style RPG elements.
Create basic custom RPG rules set.
Mine brain for crazy ideas.
Run the game for player(s).
Sunday, May 23, 2010
An event is occurring...
Lost ends tonight.
In fact, as I'm writing this, it is in its last hour.
It's a cultural event. A fairly large one. I'm not sure if this is the kind of thing that is remembered throughout the annals of history and down into the generations. But it's definitely going to cause a small ripple.
Strange to be outside of the ripple.
You usually don't think about the goings-on in other social circles. I mean, I'm sure that there is a world rodeo championship that - to the people participating in it and following it - must be a HUGE deal. But I'm not in the rodeo circle, so not only do I not care at all about the world rodeo championship, but I this is the most I've thought about it ever.
Those things don't bother me.
But, while I've never seen a single episode of Lost, I hear people talking about it every week and it definitely seems like something I would like.
I've made the decision that I'm going to watch it after the whole thing is over. I'm going to give it some time to happen and then watch it at my own pace.
While I think it would be good to experience Lost and know what people are talking about when they bring it up... it won't be the same. For the people who've been watching it every week for 5-6 some-odd years... the people who waited weeks or months (season change) to see new episodes... the people who talked and speculated week to week about what happened the night before...
An event is occurring; and right now, it is culminating.
I'm actually rather eager to hear people's thoughts and feelings on it. As someone outside of it, but interested, it puts me in a rather interesting position. Much in the way they waited for tonight to happen... I'm sort of having my own waiting game. Rather strange.
Tomorrow is going to be an interesting day.
Goodnight.
In fact, as I'm writing this, it is in its last hour.
It's a cultural event. A fairly large one. I'm not sure if this is the kind of thing that is remembered throughout the annals of history and down into the generations. But it's definitely going to cause a small ripple.
Strange to be outside of the ripple.
You usually don't think about the goings-on in other social circles. I mean, I'm sure that there is a world rodeo championship that - to the people participating in it and following it - must be a HUGE deal. But I'm not in the rodeo circle, so not only do I not care at all about the world rodeo championship, but I this is the most I've thought about it ever.
Those things don't bother me.
But, while I've never seen a single episode of Lost, I hear people talking about it every week and it definitely seems like something I would like.
I've made the decision that I'm going to watch it after the whole thing is over. I'm going to give it some time to happen and then watch it at my own pace.
While I think it would be good to experience Lost and know what people are talking about when they bring it up... it won't be the same. For the people who've been watching it every week for 5-6 some-odd years... the people who waited weeks or months (season change) to see new episodes... the people who talked and speculated week to week about what happened the night before...
An event is occurring; and right now, it is culminating.
I'm actually rather eager to hear people's thoughts and feelings on it. As someone outside of it, but interested, it puts me in a rather interesting position. Much in the way they waited for tonight to happen... I'm sort of having my own waiting game. Rather strange.
Tomorrow is going to be an interesting day.
Goodnight.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
It's quite alright with me
You know that movie Paycheck?
Yes you do, it's awesome. (Fuck you, Jeremy.)
Ben "Phantoms" Affleck is a reverse engineer who does his work then gets his mind erased. They know how far back to go because they place a sort of chemical bookmark in his brain. Trapping a moment in time and setting the place he will leave off mentally though a year (or some such) has gone by.
I found my chemical bookmark while looking through an old post. I wrote it about a month into starting my job at 2K. Stumbling onto it by accident, I was shocked at how impactful what I had written would be to me, today. It's as if, unknowingly, I had left myself a message in the past, meant for the me of the future.
Sometimes we forget how we stepped on the path we travel.
Reading the words, it instantly returned me to my mind at the moment I wrote it: What I was feeling... my dreams and my hope for the future. My confidence in my career change and choice.
I've learned a lot since then. I've experienced so much in just over a year. To think of who I was back then, it's like thinking of a different person. I've grown and changed a lot.
And... sometimes you get lost. You lose focus. Your mind clouds and you forget how and why you got to this place.
And sometimes, you just need a reminder. A fresh kick in the tuchus (if you get my meaning here). A moment of self reflection and life-check. Making sure we're doing what we want to do and are working toward the right goals. It's reassuring to look that in the eye and nod with confidence.
It's refreshing and invigorating. Breaths new life into the soul. Makes me rather happy.
It's alright,
It's quite alright with me.
Yes you do, it's awesome. (Fuck you, Jeremy.)
Ben "Phantoms" Affleck is a reverse engineer who does his work then gets his mind erased. They know how far back to go because they place a sort of chemical bookmark in his brain. Trapping a moment in time and setting the place he will leave off mentally though a year (or some such) has gone by.
I found my chemical bookmark while looking through an old post. I wrote it about a month into starting my job at 2K. Stumbling onto it by accident, I was shocked at how impactful what I had written would be to me, today. It's as if, unknowingly, I had left myself a message in the past, meant for the me of the future.
Sometimes we forget how we stepped on the path we travel.
Reading the words, it instantly returned me to my mind at the moment I wrote it: What I was feeling... my dreams and my hope for the future. My confidence in my career change and choice.
I've learned a lot since then. I've experienced so much in just over a year. To think of who I was back then, it's like thinking of a different person. I've grown and changed a lot.
And... sometimes you get lost. You lose focus. Your mind clouds and you forget how and why you got to this place.
And sometimes, you just need a reminder. A fresh kick in the tuchus (if you get my meaning here). A moment of self reflection and life-check. Making sure we're doing what we want to do and are working toward the right goals. It's reassuring to look that in the eye and nod with confidence.
It's refreshing and invigorating. Breaths new life into the soul. Makes me rather happy.
It's alright,
It's quite alright with me.
Monday, May 3, 2010
Writing Exercise - Whatever the Cost
Blood dripped onto the cold, stone floor.
Returning the ritual dagger to his belt, Adam closed his eyes, drew upon his power and whispered a name. Kneeling before a steel ring embedded onto the floor, he ran his bloodied hand over it, echoing the name again. Intoning the name a third time he empowered the circle with an effort of his will and a faint, blue glow rose around it like a barrier.
He rose as smoke billowed from within the circle, the smell of sulfur making his eyes water and burn. As it cleared, he saw a figure standing within: humanoid in shape, it had dark red skin and small horns growing from its forehead. It was dressed in fine, black robes and was resting a thick, black tome in the crook of its arm. Its eyes darted around, attempting to absorb every inch of the dark chamber.
Its voice was calm, deep and precisely articulated. It reminded Adam of his old mentor. He drew forth his power again and pointed at the creature with his bloodied hand.
The demon rolled its eyes and waved its hand in an impatient gesture.
The demon grinned hard, canine teeth flashing with the blue glow of the barrier.
Adam lowered his arm, blood running down his palm and gently splattering on the floor.
The demon’s grin grew wider.
The demon raised an eyebrow.
The demon chuckled softly to itself. Adam’s face grew red with anger.
“Does my suffering amuse you, Demon?”
Adam pointed to a small vial on the floor within the circle, next to the demon’s blackened hoof. The demon knelt down, careful not to let any part of its body touch the blue glowing barrier. It lifted the glass vial and inspected it. “Yes,” it said to itself as it unsealed the container. The demon poured the blood into its mouth, groaning softly while its split tongue hungrily licked the inside of the vial clean. Kaz closed its eyes and sighed with satisfaction.
Adam could see the demon’s eyes - pressed against its closed eyelids - rapidly darting left and right as it stood in silence. Finally, Kaz opened its eyes, canine grin returning to its face.
“Mind rot, a fantastically terrible affliction. Tell me, Wizard, how is it your wife came under this disease?”
The demon tapped its clawed finger against its teeth, pondering. “Hmm, yes, well you seem to be in luck. As it so happens, the cost for this little bargain is one and the same with the key component needed for the ritual. Return it to me and you shall have your wife.”
Adam inhaled sharply as his eyes shot wide. “Brom,” he whispered.
Thoughts flashed in Adam’s mind. Images of days gone by… a pair of young boys running through the spring fields; youthful men, close as brothers, practicing the sword and their lessons; one, seated on the Throne; the other, by his side with words of Wizened counsel.
The demon stared intently at Adam.
Adam’s eyes refocused on Kaz, grim in intent.
Adam stood in silence, reflecting.
The demon sighed, its face serious, eyes glowing. Kaz spoke with a practiced calm.
Tears began to stream down Adam’s face.
Kaz pointed at Adam, its gaze piercing. “You spilled your own blood and summoned me here. You beseeched me for a cure and you have found it. It is within your power, Wizard! You looked into your wife’s eyes and promised her you will do anything it takes, whatever the cost, to cure her. Will you be called Oathbreaker and let her die?”
Adam’s bloodshot eyes stared hard into the demon’s glowing orbs, spittle dribbling down his lips.
“Then do what must be done! Fulfill your duty! Say the words!”
His uncut hand reached for the ritual dagger, gripping it tightly. Drawing it forth before him, Adam slid his palm across the glowing barrier, smearing blood in front of the Demon’s eyes.
Adam closed his eyes and chanted slowly, “…Ei-hu, Adam Kad-amon, sharrat, Kaz’rallah Hesh-barashamon…”
Kaz began to growl, deep and otherworldly; it raised its head high as the chamber filled with the hum of power and Adam’s haunting chant. Brushing its hand against the blood-coated barrier, the Demon’s eyes flared with hellish light, predator grin on its face.
The demon opened the book it clutched to a page covered in Infernal script; a thick, plumed feather appearing in its open hand...
----------------------------------------------------
The door opened.
Adam entered the room, leaving behind him an empty chamber with a simple steel circle embedded at its center.
Closing the door behind him, he approached the sleeping form of his beloved, Leah. Gently kissing her on the forehead, he caressed her smooth cheek - his blood matting her hair and dripping onto her lips.
Turning slowly, Adam walked away from his slowly dying wife; blood gently dripping on the cold, stone floor.
Truth and the Mind
For all the many ways we are each a unique snowflake;
We are also very much the same.
If we are in some manner the same, that means that to understand the self is to understand others.
If we know what makes us do what we do;
If we know what makes us feel what we feel;
If we can predict our own behavior...
We can predict the behavior of others.
If we can predict the behavior of others, we can begin to ask questions.
Questions that form hypothesis;
Hypothesis that form the basis for experiment.
Through experiment, we can begin to unlock the secrets of our very nature.
We begin to understand the various aspects of our humanity.
We can peel away the animal brain... the instinct and biological drive that whispers from the subconscious;
We can explain how we respond to each other and to the world.
We have learned so much about the mind... so much about why - and how - we are...
But, if we can delve deeper;
Search beyond what we can analyze, catalogue and empirically define...
What will we find?
Perhaps, the soul?
We are also very much the same.
If we are in some manner the same, that means that to understand the self is to understand others.
If we know what makes us do what we do;
If we know what makes us feel what we feel;
If we can predict our own behavior...
We can predict the behavior of others.
If we can predict the behavior of others, we can begin to ask questions.
Questions that form hypothesis;
Hypothesis that form the basis for experiment.
Through experiment, we can begin to unlock the secrets of our very nature.
We begin to understand the various aspects of our humanity.
We can peel away the animal brain... the instinct and biological drive that whispers from the subconscious;
We can explain how we respond to each other and to the world.
We have learned so much about the mind... so much about why - and how - we are...
But, if we can delve deeper;
Search beyond what we can analyze, catalogue and empirically define...
What will we find?
Perhaps, the soul?
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Be the Change You Want To See In The World: Memoirs of an Ex-Pirate
I was there, at Napster.
Actually, I was there in IRC and AOL warez, mm and <>< chat rooms.
Back then, people thought of it differently. I remember when I was talking to some guys, talking about how they have over 72 GB of music (this is back in the late 90's mind you) and just being completely amazed and awed. To think these guys had been able to accumulate such a horde of music and software... it was incredible. Free versions of retail software that I otherwise couldn't ever possibly dream of affording. Tons and tons of music, more music than I had ever known existed at the time. Games... oh man, the games... I wanted some of that.
I remember friends telling me how they leave for school in the morning and set a whole bunch of stuff to download so its going all day... and do the same at night before going to bed. I remember people starting to get CD burners and for the cost of a blank disc you could get practically anything you wish. Someone had it.
And I searched for it. I sought it out. I amassed vast collections and shared them with others. I used the size of my cache to get me into exclusive IRC channels and networks that had minimum GB/TB share sizes. It was a fascinating world... one where people, just like you and me, dealt with incredible values in software and digital media. Like black market cartel tycoons, trading in vast amounts of illicit goods.
And it's not like we didn't know this was wrong. We understood that this was dealing in stolen merchandise, stuff that we didn't pay for but are benefiting from. Free riding on the work and money of others. But honestly, I don't think it really mattered to anyone. It was a subtle acknowledgment. At some point, everyone looked at themselves and said (in one way or another), "What you are doing is wrong." And we looked back and said, "Yeah, but I'm okay with it." Filed it away and moved on.
As time went on and the needs/desires of the pirate community grew, so did the technology. Gone were the days of FTP transfers and multi-part zip files. Things became a lot easier and with it, people who normally wouldn't be pirates due to non-tech-saviness, now they could easily take part in the action.
I remember when I first heard about bittorent. There was a website that posted scan translated copies of japanese manga by a certain artist. When the issue came out in Japan, it was scanned and translated to english by the site owners (or fans) and posted on the site. You downloaded a zip file and looked at jpegs to your hearts content. None of the manga was licensed in America, so it was legit on this side of the pacific. And one day they announced that they wouldn't be posting zip files anymore on the website. It took up too much bandwidth and instead they are going to use this thing called bittorent.
The day the manga was to be posted on the site, they got some people to seed the files and everyone, using the software off bittorent.com, was able to get it really quickly and easily. As long as people seeded we were able to download it whenever we wanted and, hey, be cool and seed for a while whydoncha. Sure, why not. It worked and everyone was happy. Most people still didn't really know about it.
But then people wised up and realized, hey, you can send ANYTHING via bittornet! Things exploded from there... bittorent sites were created and well, you know what happened then.
I was still on board onto this point. It became so easy to get anything you wanted that I grew beyond the need for a collection. If there was something I wanted, I torrented it. When I was done, I deleted it. If I needed it again, no sweat, rinse and repeat. I even considered myself tame in comparison to some friends of mine... hell, everyone! Torrenting had just become a part of life, something you did as easily as check e-mail and post on facebook. It's then that some things changed for me.
All through college, I was simultaneously working on internship stuff for the CCG (and hobby gaming) industry. Ran playtest groups, worked conventions, did demos, ran tournaments, forums, etc. etc. etc. I knew that no matter what, I wanted to work in games. That is my passion, that is what I want to spend the rest of my life doing. And with that, meant I had chosen a life in the entertainment industry.
I started to learn things... once I graduated and switched gears I decided to start working in the Video Game Industry. I started to learn how things really worked, I started to become a part of the community and I sort of crossed the curtain and got backstage. Like any career, there exists a social circle and community associated with fellow people who work in the same field/industry. The Video Game Community, while successful and prevalent, is still relatively small and news gets around. And you begin to become a bit more interested in the news regarding piracy.
We all grow and mature as we age. We begin to concrete and solidify the beliefs and morals we had struggled to form during our adolescence. As such, my views, thoughts and feelings toward piracy had changed as well. Being raised how I was and given my experiences growing up in Los Angeles, I began to understand just how important piracy is and how much of an impact it really does have.
I get into arguments with people all the time and I could debate this topic all day, but this isn't what I had intended for this post. The point is, everyone is entitled to their position and thoughts on piracy. I look at it, and I just can't believe in it anymore. Where once I wouldn't hesitate to download a game or movie or even a ROM, now, I find it difficult to justify it to myself. I know in my heart, that its wrong. It has a significant impact on the entire entertainment industry and is a serious problem that I believe needs to be resolved some how.
We as a species understand the need for entertainment, escape and joyful fun. We devote a significant portion of our lives, money and time toward ensuring we have some measure of it. It is important for our development as individuals and for the preservation of the cultural heritage of our species. In all walks of life, people like to play games, listen to stories and have fun. It is in our best interest to continue to nurture it and let it grow, so that it advances with us into the future.
I know a lot of people who like to blame the industry and put it on them to fix the problem. "What are they going to do to combat piracy? Piracy is a real problem, I wonder how they're going to deal with it." There is a general sense that piracy is a permanent part of human existence (in its current state of ease and prevalence) and that the only thing the industry can do is find a way around it or just succumb to its power. I don't like the answers the industry is coming up with... DRM, copy protection, install limits, etc. All pretty much bummer stuff that is no fun for the consumer or the people who are forced to implement them.
It also doesn't mean that Piracy is some mystical unstoppable force. It is not a materialized entity, whose form fears not of mortal efforts. Piracy is people. It is people who have access to an easy, low-risk, anonymous form of theft. Circumstances are pretty prime for this sort of crime; especially by people who would otherwise not engage in such activity had it be something that was difficult to execute, carry with it high risk or require them to be openly exposed.
A certain amount of "shrinkage", theft or hacking/cracking is something any business has to deal with. Not too long ago, all you had to worry about was employee theft, the rare break-in/robbery, the skilled hacker, etc. Things that were an expected loss and you compensated in some form.
Today, well, you can't compensate for what's going on. To that end, I've decided that a solution, at least for me, is to live by the old saying: Be the change you want to see in the world. In order for piracy to stop, people just need to stop taking things that they didn't pay for. Realize that while it may be free to you, its costing all the people who made it - something (not necessarily money.) That it's wrong and all of us who knew then, still know now... that it isn't okay and only we can stop it.
That's how I feel, that's what I decided. I just wasn't going to pirate anymore. If it's something that I really do want, well, I'll just have to pay for it. And I'll be happy to know that the money went toward the people who made the thing that made me so happy and entertained. I hope to be so lucky.
That's been the idea, ever since I made that decision. It's been a little while and, well, it's a rather interesting experience (from a psychological/scientific perspective.) It's been rather miserable at times, to be honest. It's sort of like weening yourself of any sort of addiction. It was a part of my life for so long and I had engaged in it so easily and thoughtlessly... it's a tough habit to break.
I'm not a saint, nor am I perfect. I am in pursuit of a form of perfection... an emotional and moral pedestal that I make my way toward. A concept, mindset and ideal that I know in my heart to be good and right. To live a life, free of any form of piracy.
I've had my moments of weakness... you're at a buddies house, he asks if you want to watch a movie... you're in a mood, you agree to the film... he torrents it quickly and you watch it. My xbox classic is still hacked, with emulators full of roms... (though I haven't used it since I made the decision.) I watched a wrestling thing on JustinTV...
I know those things were wrong. I strive toward not doing anything like that. I've made changes and I feel better for them. As I said, I'm not perfect. I don't think that makes me a hypocrite, I think it makes me human.
Something rather ironic happened recently that's in line with what I'm talking about here so I wanted to share that as well. I've decided to unhack my PSP and go legit on it. But because of the hack, I can't overwrite the hacked System Software. So I had to go online and order a hacking kit (with Pandora Battery) so that I could hack the PSP and put the official software on it and erase the mods. So strange but appropriate, I think.
A rather fitting metaphor.
Goodnight.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
On occasion, just as I am getting into bed - and my mind begins to wander - I start to think of things. Things I feel I should write down. But I'm tired and sleepy... the very reasons I got into bed in the first place. I tell myself, "You'll write it down in the morning... or sometime tomorrow. You'll totally remember." *cough* Yeah, so I lose a lot of really cool shit (at least I think so.) And I made a promise to myself that I'd try to get my ass out of bed when this happens and write it down.
So this was the first time doing it. I lost about 45 minutes of sleep doing it, but I'm glad I did it. Feels good to follow through on that. I'll be sure to read this tomorrow and see what I wrote... the problem with writing while falling into sleep is that the words sort of appear, make their way to the screen and then vanish. Here's hoping it made sense.
Signing out.
Actually, I was there in IRC and AOL warez, mm and <>< chat rooms.
Back then, people thought of it differently. I remember when I was talking to some guys, talking about how they have over 72 GB of music (this is back in the late 90's mind you) and just being completely amazed and awed. To think these guys had been able to accumulate such a horde of music and software... it was incredible. Free versions of retail software that I otherwise couldn't ever possibly dream of affording. Tons and tons of music, more music than I had ever known existed at the time. Games... oh man, the games... I wanted some of that.
I remember friends telling me how they leave for school in the morning and set a whole bunch of stuff to download so its going all day... and do the same at night before going to bed. I remember people starting to get CD burners and for the cost of a blank disc you could get practically anything you wish. Someone had it.
And I searched for it. I sought it out. I amassed vast collections and shared them with others. I used the size of my cache to get me into exclusive IRC channels and networks that had minimum GB/TB share sizes. It was a fascinating world... one where people, just like you and me, dealt with incredible values in software and digital media. Like black market cartel tycoons, trading in vast amounts of illicit goods.
And it's not like we didn't know this was wrong. We understood that this was dealing in stolen merchandise, stuff that we didn't pay for but are benefiting from. Free riding on the work and money of others. But honestly, I don't think it really mattered to anyone. It was a subtle acknowledgment. At some point, everyone looked at themselves and said (in one way or another), "What you are doing is wrong." And we looked back and said, "Yeah, but I'm okay with it." Filed it away and moved on.
As time went on and the needs/desires of the pirate community grew, so did the technology. Gone were the days of FTP transfers and multi-part zip files. Things became a lot easier and with it, people who normally wouldn't be pirates due to non-tech-saviness, now they could easily take part in the action.
I remember when I first heard about bittorent. There was a website that posted scan translated copies of japanese manga by a certain artist. When the issue came out in Japan, it was scanned and translated to english by the site owners (or fans) and posted on the site. You downloaded a zip file and looked at jpegs to your hearts content. None of the manga was licensed in America, so it was legit on this side of the pacific. And one day they announced that they wouldn't be posting zip files anymore on the website. It took up too much bandwidth and instead they are going to use this thing called bittorent.
The day the manga was to be posted on the site, they got some people to seed the files and everyone, using the software off bittorent.com, was able to get it really quickly and easily. As long as people seeded we were able to download it whenever we wanted and, hey, be cool and seed for a while whydoncha. Sure, why not. It worked and everyone was happy. Most people still didn't really know about it.
But then people wised up and realized, hey, you can send ANYTHING via bittornet! Things exploded from there... bittorent sites were created and well, you know what happened then.
I was still on board onto this point. It became so easy to get anything you wanted that I grew beyond the need for a collection. If there was something I wanted, I torrented it. When I was done, I deleted it. If I needed it again, no sweat, rinse and repeat. I even considered myself tame in comparison to some friends of mine... hell, everyone! Torrenting had just become a part of life, something you did as easily as check e-mail and post on facebook. It's then that some things changed for me.
All through college, I was simultaneously working on internship stuff for the CCG (and hobby gaming) industry. Ran playtest groups, worked conventions, did demos, ran tournaments, forums, etc. etc. etc. I knew that no matter what, I wanted to work in games. That is my passion, that is what I want to spend the rest of my life doing. And with that, meant I had chosen a life in the entertainment industry.
I started to learn things... once I graduated and switched gears I decided to start working in the Video Game Industry. I started to learn how things really worked, I started to become a part of the community and I sort of crossed the curtain and got backstage. Like any career, there exists a social circle and community associated with fellow people who work in the same field/industry. The Video Game Community, while successful and prevalent, is still relatively small and news gets around. And you begin to become a bit more interested in the news regarding piracy.
We all grow and mature as we age. We begin to concrete and solidify the beliefs and morals we had struggled to form during our adolescence. As such, my views, thoughts and feelings toward piracy had changed as well. Being raised how I was and given my experiences growing up in Los Angeles, I began to understand just how important piracy is and how much of an impact it really does have.
I get into arguments with people all the time and I could debate this topic all day, but this isn't what I had intended for this post. The point is, everyone is entitled to their position and thoughts on piracy. I look at it, and I just can't believe in it anymore. Where once I wouldn't hesitate to download a game or movie or even a ROM, now, I find it difficult to justify it to myself. I know in my heart, that its wrong. It has a significant impact on the entire entertainment industry and is a serious problem that I believe needs to be resolved some how.
We as a species understand the need for entertainment, escape and joyful fun. We devote a significant portion of our lives, money and time toward ensuring we have some measure of it. It is important for our development as individuals and for the preservation of the cultural heritage of our species. In all walks of life, people like to play games, listen to stories and have fun. It is in our best interest to continue to nurture it and let it grow, so that it advances with us into the future.
I know a lot of people who like to blame the industry and put it on them to fix the problem. "What are they going to do to combat piracy? Piracy is a real problem, I wonder how they're going to deal with it." There is a general sense that piracy is a permanent part of human existence (in its current state of ease and prevalence) and that the only thing the industry can do is find a way around it or just succumb to its power. I don't like the answers the industry is coming up with... DRM, copy protection, install limits, etc. All pretty much bummer stuff that is no fun for the consumer or the people who are forced to implement them.
It also doesn't mean that Piracy is some mystical unstoppable force. It is not a materialized entity, whose form fears not of mortal efforts. Piracy is people. It is people who have access to an easy, low-risk, anonymous form of theft. Circumstances are pretty prime for this sort of crime; especially by people who would otherwise not engage in such activity had it be something that was difficult to execute, carry with it high risk or require them to be openly exposed.
A certain amount of "shrinkage", theft or hacking/cracking is something any business has to deal with. Not too long ago, all you had to worry about was employee theft, the rare break-in/robbery, the skilled hacker, etc. Things that were an expected loss and you compensated in some form.
Today, well, you can't compensate for what's going on. To that end, I've decided that a solution, at least for me, is to live by the old saying: Be the change you want to see in the world. In order for piracy to stop, people just need to stop taking things that they didn't pay for. Realize that while it may be free to you, its costing all the people who made it - something (not necessarily money.) That it's wrong and all of us who knew then, still know now... that it isn't okay and only we can stop it.
That's how I feel, that's what I decided. I just wasn't going to pirate anymore. If it's something that I really do want, well, I'll just have to pay for it. And I'll be happy to know that the money went toward the people who made the thing that made me so happy and entertained. I hope to be so lucky.
That's been the idea, ever since I made that decision. It's been a little while and, well, it's a rather interesting experience (from a psychological/scientific perspective.) It's been rather miserable at times, to be honest. It's sort of like weening yourself of any sort of addiction. It was a part of my life for so long and I had engaged in it so easily and thoughtlessly... it's a tough habit to break.
I'm not a saint, nor am I perfect. I am in pursuit of a form of perfection... an emotional and moral pedestal that I make my way toward. A concept, mindset and ideal that I know in my heart to be good and right. To live a life, free of any form of piracy.
I've had my moments of weakness... you're at a buddies house, he asks if you want to watch a movie... you're in a mood, you agree to the film... he torrents it quickly and you watch it. My xbox classic is still hacked, with emulators full of roms... (though I haven't used it since I made the decision.) I watched a wrestling thing on JustinTV...
I know those things were wrong. I strive toward not doing anything like that. I've made changes and I feel better for them. As I said, I'm not perfect. I don't think that makes me a hypocrite, I think it makes me human.
Something rather ironic happened recently that's in line with what I'm talking about here so I wanted to share that as well. I've decided to unhack my PSP and go legit on it. But because of the hack, I can't overwrite the hacked System Software. So I had to go online and order a hacking kit (with Pandora Battery) so that I could hack the PSP and put the official software on it and erase the mods. So strange but appropriate, I think.
A rather fitting metaphor.
Goodnight.
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On occasion, just as I am getting into bed - and my mind begins to wander - I start to think of things. Things I feel I should write down. But I'm tired and sleepy... the very reasons I got into bed in the first place. I tell myself, "You'll write it down in the morning... or sometime tomorrow. You'll totally remember." *cough* Yeah, so I lose a lot of really cool shit (at least I think so.) And I made a promise to myself that I'd try to get my ass out of bed when this happens and write it down.
So this was the first time doing it. I lost about 45 minutes of sleep doing it, but I'm glad I did it. Feels good to follow through on that. I'll be sure to read this tomorrow and see what I wrote... the problem with writing while falling into sleep is that the words sort of appear, make their way to the screen and then vanish. Here's hoping it made sense.
Signing out.
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